If you want to end your marriage amid feelings of anger, resentment and mistrust towards your spouse, you may be wondering, “How can we possibly work together on a divorce when we can’t even stand to be in the same room?”
The good news is that amicable divorces can still be possible, even in contentious situations.
Working together when you’d rather not
Mediation is a process that can help you and your spouse work together despite your differences or hostility. A neutral third-party mediator facilitates discussions, ensuring they remain fair, focused and productive. This can be especially helpful when emotions are running high. Some benefits of working with a mediator during divorce include:
- Encouraging collaborative problem-solving rather than adversarial posturing
- Identifying common goals and interests to drive the negotiation process
- Providing a safe and structured environment for open communication
- Helping parties prioritize their needs and concerns
- Fostering creative solutions that benefit both parties
These strategies can help diffuse tension and create a more productive atmosphere for negotiations.
Strategies to help you stay sane during a difficult divorce
Throughout any divorce process, people’s actions and personal history can make it challenging to feel in control of your situation and emotions. What can you do if the idea of cooperation seems out of reach? Here are some strategies:
- Set clear communication boundaries: Decide on acceptable ways and times to communicate. Emails or texts can reduce heated exchanges and keep records clear.
- Focus on the bigger picture: Remember that the goal is a fair resolution, not winning.
- Get the support you need: Seek support from trusted friends, family or a therapist. Work with legal and financial professionals to help you make sound, informed decisions.
These strategies can help you stay calm and focused, even when dealing with a difficult ex. They create distance when you need it while still moving the process forward.
Moving forward with confidence
An amicable divorce may seem like a pipe dream, especially when animosity is high. However, with the right tools and support, working together is possible, even when you can’t stand each other. By understanding the mediation process and employing effective strategies, you can confidently navigate the divorce process and emerge stronger on the other side.
